European officials vow that terrorism will not change their way of life as they close New Year’s venues


BRUXELLES – Right after open air festivities for New Year’s Eve were canceled in the Belgian capital over fears of terrorism, many officials of European countries took to their social media profiles and again expressed their steadfastness in the face of the threat of terror.

French President Francois Hollande reminded that he will continue showing no mercy towards ISIL, and that ISIL terrorists will never change the French way of life, mentioning that he gave permission for razor wire and tanks to be deployed at key tourist attractions in Paris to protect the French way of life.

Chancellor of Germany Angela Merkel tweeted that terrorism is a threat that needs to be acted upon, then addressed refugees directly and promised a fully furnished apartment, lifetime of food coupons and a mosque free of security monitoring in every street block for every refugee family that comes to Germany. “Everyone from Senegal to the Philippines, leave your countries, it’s better here, and burn your documents if you haven’t already! We don’t check them anyway!” she added.

Eiffel Tower

The Eiffel tower stands in defiance closed to visitors after the Nov 13 Paris attacks

Russian President Vladimir Putin reiterated that Russia will never succumb to fear of terrorists, right after the New Year’s celebration on Moscow’s Red Square was canceled for security reasons. This defiant show of fearlessness also comes two months since Russian tourists cannot fly to Egypt on holiday because a Russian passenger jet was destroyed by a smuggled ISIL explosive, and three months since Russia has entered the fight in Syria, but its soldiers stationed there have still never engaged the terrorists directly on the ground. President Putin also didn’t fail to mention Turkish President Erdogan again, like he has in every one of his public addresses since Turkey shot down a Russian military jet in Syria. In this last witty remark the Russian president wrote that Mr. Erdogan has “replaced the contents of his skull with the contents of his toilet.”

British Prime Minister Cameron wrote on Facebook that Britain is built upon immovable European values of democracy, freedom and human rights, and that terrorism cannot force the country to deviate from these values. He then announced a proposal for a law that would allow police to shoot recreational drone operators on sight. We remind that the traditionally unarmed British police officers have been armed with standard issue Heckler & Koch MP7 sub-machine guns shortly after the Paris attacks.

Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan first tweeted that Turkey is also part of Europe. After repeating that in several more tweets, he finally condemned “Kurdish terrorists” in Turkey and Syria. When another Twitter user asked “What about ISIL?”, Mr. Erdogan banned Twitter in Turkey again.